Not a bad idea

I hate the word ‘Waiting’!! thank God I said it out at last. It is heartbreaking, it brings me high dose of nervousness, it makes me cry, it exposes my vulnerability to people and most especially to God. It shows my sense of not being in control, if you are like me, then I am relieved that am not alone in this. Whenever I  hear the word ‘Patience’ or ‘Waiting’,  what  usually comes  along with it , is lot of squirming and pain because I happen to be born in a microwave generation , a generation that wants things done in a split second, one that has no tolerance for processes or a long plan. I have been conditioned from the womb to dislike anything that looks like waiting, my orientation has been tuned to having things land on my laps as soon as I open my mouth to ask for it.

This obvious dislike for patience is what makes me most times run life on the fast track, it is what makes me try to play god in any situation that arise.

Waiting for me includes not getting a better job quickly, loads of prayer points still pending  at God’s door,  disappointing situations that make me so weak , issues that apparently refuse to let go , habits that I love to drop but still clinging to my hem. As you all know I got married few months ago with high levels of expectations, naturally believing that the world will drop still at my feet because I am now a  Mrs. , but I have come to know that in every situation I need to do some waiting.

Waiting on God is something I have been learning to do since I signed the dotted lines, waiting on Him is something He needs to teach me to be strong , it is what I have to go through to become a better person. Though God still works in present dramatic ways , He however loves to take us through long periods of being still in His presence , seasons  of  helplessness that we might know and crave His awesomeness.

I usually believe that waiting is a sign of been punished for something that I have done against God, I have grown up to believe that waiting is some awkward word used only for the unfortunate but I am so wrong because in waiting I find strength, in waiting I find God, in waiting I find eternal peace. Though everyday that I wait , it is a difficult thing to do, I barely find strength to go through a whole day before I dissolve into doubt, but with every line of doubt , there is a huge amount of faith being released into my system. At the end of the day, waiting is not such a bad idea.