What I want in a man? part 2


Christmas this year was one ‘quick show’ for me, as I only got a day off from work to travel home to Ilesa, so I had to spend the other day (boxing day) at work which was very sad for me, people that heard that I was at work only confirmed their fears of me being a workaholic, lol.

One good thing that  came out from this ‘always at work’ issue is that I have finally learnt how to be stay  still in a place and think , hours of being glued in front of the  system has produced periods of meditation which I have not being able to achieve in the past years. With the meditation sessions comes along my new hobby: MUSIC, while streaming through songs last  Christmas , since I was stuck in the office , I heard a song from Toni Braxton.

Toni Braxton’s ‘Woman’ made sense to me as I gently swing my hips to the beats , ‘I am a woman who knows what she wants,,,,,’ and the question that keeps appearing in my mind is ‘ what exactly do I need in a man’ . This question scares me more than the rodents that invaded my room when I was in the University , because I really can’t answer , I know am supposed to know ,but I don’t because I can only have a list if I know myself. Since I wrote the first part of this piece , I have been going about with a small brown jotter in my bag , scribbling my thoughts every minute trying so hard to compile something for this piece am writing.

Now am writing , and without the small brown jotter because the list in it  doesn’t make sense to me , if I were to go by a list , then I would have had an answer to Buky when she asked me . If I were to have a list then it is not going to start at all with  a Man , it’s not going to  make it’s headlines’ MAN LIST’, because it is not about him this time , it is about having that long chat with God , so that I can really know who I am. My list is not starting with MAN-CAPABILITIES, it  is starting with me.

When Buky mentioned ‘list’  weeks ago , I was a little bit insincere because I had a list then , I had a list I have been judging men with  all these years , it’s a twisted one , but I have it anyway , it goes thus : God fearing , intelligent, handsome , smart, high sense of humour , easy to be with , and obviously taller than me , romantic, passionate , e.t.c , that was the list in my mind, I guessed I didn’t tell  Buky about it  because I knew right in my heart , that was not the list God wanted, though it looks kind of cool. My old list is self- centred , petty , it’s a list that asks too much from  a human . It should not be like that .

I am a woman , and I ovulate every month ,that is not a mistake , it is for a purpose , I am specifically created by God to bring comfort to everyone around me , bring love to people that seemingly  look as if they don’t need it , add wisdom to my beauty at all times , be the best wife any man can ask for , train up kids that will in future destroy the kingdom of hell , that is the list I should have, not going about having 101 things my man should have  .

If I fail to be all these , then I am certainly not in a position to have a list about a man at all , because if he were to be the best man that ever walked on  this earth , I will never be fit for him.In all this I pray to God to make  me a woman that will be a woman in deed because eventually the Bible saying ‘Deep calls  unto deep in the roar of your waterfall’ will come true between me and my man.

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